My Me-ness

 The awareness of being a sovereign being is empowering. Realizing the truth of coming into the world alone and leaving alone puts the onus on me to also rely upon myself to find my own contentment, joy, satisfaction, and serenity.

Not that I don’t feel the need for others—companionship, friendship, sharing in a deep and personal nature—these things serve to enhance the experience of living. I would have a much less rich life if I tried to live a completely hermit-like existence. No, thank you! I love (mostly) the interactions I have with my friends and family. I learn from the challenging ones, which help me grow. I’m nourished by the sweet ones, which help me smile.

Ultimately, my happiness resides within myself. When it glows, others feel it, and are hopefully encouraged to feel the same within themselves. It works the other way, too, so I want to be one who is a light, not a flame-snuffer. 

It seems like a dichotomy, this need to both find my joy in myself and feeling the need to share it with others. I am responsible only for myself, right? Just as we all are. But here’s the deal: the buck stops here. Nobody “made” me do anything I did to harm myself and others. (there are, of course, painful exceptions in many lives). As I’ve messed up, I’ve learned to own my responsibility and try to make amends. 

I came here alone, and I’ll leave alone. In the in-between time, I’ll own my own feelings and situations, while enjoying the ups and downs of being with all the others who come into my life. I’m grateful for all of it!